Thief Produces Surprising Bulge In His Pants During Pet Store Raid

turtle2Turtles have a rough life. The last thing they need to worry about is some crazy idiot interrupting their well-earned peace and quiet and sticking them down their pants. For one poor turtle in Spring, Texas, being stuck down someone’s pants was more than just some crazy nightmare. Instead it became a strange, strange reality. Good thing there were surveillance cameras there to witness the scene.

On Wednesday, August 12, a thief targeting a pet store in Spring posed as a customer and searched the store before using a piece of metal to pry open one of the store cabinets, from where he then removed the fist-sized Indian Star Tortoise and shoved it into the left pocket of his jeans. He lucked out in not grabbing a snapping turtle. That would have been uncomfortable.

“We’ve been here twenty years and I’ve never had a customer shove a turtle in his pants,” said Sherry Stack, Pet City owner.

turtlePet City’s 27 surveillance cameras captured the entire area both in and surrounding the store and were able to capture the thief, clearly enjoying a bulging tortoise moving around in his pants more than he should, stopping at the front to goofilly flash the peace sign. Even as the tortoise was unjustly trapped, the jerky thief was clearly having the time of his life.

“The way he was so blatant giving us a peace sign on the way out on the video camera, it looked like he was doing it just for the fun of it,” said store owner Paul Stack.

Security cameras show the man getting into a white Nissan Frontier pickup truck with temporary tags.

Indian Star tortoises are priced at $600 and can be worth much more once they reach full growth. The culprit has not been found yet, but with the brilliant subtlety of his theft, it shouldn’t take much time for him to be brought to justice.

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